Park With Me

bethrobin

Get Flash to see this player.

Description

I don't think anyone will need an explanation for this song. It is what it is. We've all been there and would probably love to go back there again right now. oops. I'm at work.
This is my first collaboration here on MacJams. I heard some songs by perceptualvortex and was blown away by the depth and excitement in his drumming. I was really curious to hear what he could do with a song like this.

Leave a Comment

You must be registered and logged-in to comment.

Lyrics

Come on out and park with me
Where no prying eyes can see
Watch them pretty city lights below
Take me where you know I want to go
Come on out and park with me

Come on out and lay me down
Where there's no one else around
Listen to that summer breeze
Whisper through the swaying trees
Come on out and lay me down

Well I don't need no fancy bed
Cause I've got romance in my head
Pass that bottle with a straw
I don't need a glass at all
I'm just gonna drink it all

Take me where I want to go
Not too fast and not too slow
Tell me I'm the only one
Hold me till the moonlight turns to sun
come on out and park with me

Song Stats

Hits: 1311
Comments: 20
Fans: 1
Plays: 224
Downloads: 61
Votes: 5
Uploaded: May 22, 2006 - 06:24:41 PM
Last Updated: May 23, 2006 - 11:10:56 AM Last Played: Oct 30, 2009 - 04:21:05 PM

Song License

Creative Commons License:
NoDerivs-NonCommercial

Song Actions

Keywords:

perceptualvortex (48), drummers (1), love (1147), jazzy (29), slow (101), sultry (6), smooth (97), park (6)

Comments

Epileptic Gibbon

Epileptic Gibbon said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)

Mmmmmm%u2026
smooth jazz%u2026 nice! Smooth too, but I guess that's a given. PV is a great drummer but I've not heard him play on anything like this before. Other comments? Well, this is not the sort of thing I listen to very often but that's not to say that I don't like it. The lyrics are sweet and the general songwriting is good. I think I would like to hear more confidence in the vocals (they fit the song well but I feel that they could be a lot stronger) and perhaps PV's drums could be taken down in the mix just a little as they tend to dominate (great though they are, the rest of the music needs space to breathe and shine). I like the jazzy guitar and would like to hear that up in the mix a little to compensate.

Check out my latest song called Fiddler Off the Roof w/Komrade K & Caroline

Epileptic Gibbon	Epileptic Gibbon said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)
	Mmmmmm%u2026 Oops, excuse the … on my previous comment. --- "You never say please. You never say thank you." "Please don't be an idiot. Thank you." -- Bayliss and Pembleton Check out my latest song called Fiddler Off the Roof w/Komrade K & Caroline

bethrobin	bethrobin said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)
	Mmmmmm%u2026 Thanks for your comments. I'm glad you like the song, and I know you're a fan of vortex. I think he adds a whole other dimension and depth to this song. My vocal is not as commanding as I'd like it to be, but I'm still looking for the perfect room, mic and settings. I've got it in me somewhere. Check out my latest song called Park With Me

Epileptic Gibbon

Epileptic Gibbon said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)

Mmmmmm%u2026
I'm sure you do have it in there. Good luck with finding what you need to bring it out. I'm sure it's as much to do with time and confidence, but invest in a better mic too if you can because there's certainly enough potential there for it to be a worthwhile purchase. Keep singing and writing! :)

---
"You never say please. You never say thank you."
"Please don't be an idiot. Thank you."
-- Bayliss and Pembleton

Check out my latest song called Fiddler Off the Roof w/Komrade K & Caroline

Jim Bouchard

Jim Bouchard said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)

I hope you don't mind a little suggestion...
Although PV is a great drummer, I think for this style song brushes
would have been a better fit, and all the fills sort of overwhelm the
your vocal. Maybe your vocal needs to be louder, but then again, the
subject matter of the song is such that the quieter vocal approach that
you're using is probably appropriate. "Whisper through the swaying
trees" for example. Though very well played and they certainly sound
great, it just seems like the drums are for a different song. Perhaps is
the drums were mixed down a bit they would work, but I think it might
just need an altogether lighter touch to match the true nature of the
song. It is a great drum track though, and maybe I'm way off base,
since I'm not a drummer at all... but I do make a lot of softer rock
based songs like this and I know what I like.

Check out my latest song called Weather or Not w/awigze

perceptualvortex

perceptualvortex said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)

I hope you don't mind a little suggestion...
I know what you mean about the drums; my first iteration drum track was
half brushes and half sticks, and I wasn't sure if it woulda been best to do
one or the other or both. Obviously I went with the all-sticks version, but
the lighter touch might have been better. We hard rockers are always too
heavy on the drums, even the virtual ones! I encouraged Beth to raise the
drums in the mix, because the drum performance is pretty loud--lowering it
makes the drums sound farther away instead of softer; so you're
penultimate remark about needing a track with a lighter touch is probably
right on. Thanks for listening and commenting, Jim.

---
<a href="http://www.macjams.com/song/20532">Vera (w Vac)</a>

Check out my latest song called Machine Man (w Beastie Boys)

announcer

announcer said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)

You need to work on your mixing skills
This is a good track but the mix is rough. Others here have mentioned
the lack of balance in the track and the "weak" vocal. Some of this
could be fixed by understanding and working on the mix and the use
of some of the dynamics processing not only on the voice alone but
also on the overall mixdown. It also sounds like you have some popped
"Ps" on the vocal. Build yourself a good pop filter using a embroidery
hoop and some nylon panty hose. Cheap and easy to do. Keep working
on these skills because you have some good chops.

Check out my latest song called It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

bethrobin

bethrobin said 1265 days ago (May 23rd, 2006)

You need to work on your mixing skills
I'm very new at this home recording. thanks for the help. I really do need
those skills. Mixing and recording my voice. Give me numbers please. I
recorded the vocal as hot as
I could without clipping, and only with a little reverb. What else should I do? I
need to stand about 5 inches from the mic (an AKG 535) condenser mic so it
doesn't clip. I've tried other effects but nothing sounds right. Any help would
be greatly appreciated.

Also any one reading this, I'd love it if you'd put in a vote for me to get on the
radio!

http://openmic.folkalley.com/BethRobinson

Check out my latest song called Park With Me

announcer

announcer said 1264 days ago (May 24th, 2006)

You need to work on your mixing skills
What are you using to get the mic signal into the computer? Here is a link for
making a cheap but effective pop filter: http://www.deansabatino.com/2005/
08/21/67/
Plug ins in GB to experiment with include the dynamics plug in on a track.
and on the master you might experiment with the AU Multi band dynamics
processor. On the dynamics plug in the settings are:
Threshold: It is the volume which the compressor starts to act on the signal.
Attack: how quickly the compressor starts to act. Too quick and the attack of
the note is gone too slow and the attack of the note may clip.
Ratio: how many dB change on the input to how many db change on the
output. A good place to start with vocals is about 1.5to 1 or 2 to 1 or maybe
as much as three to one ratio.
Release: how quickly there is make up gain when the sound tails off. Too
quick and the compressor will "pump" ... too little and it will not turn up the
soft sounds.
Output: this will help you make up gain that is lost through the compression
process.
Think of the compressor as a little guy in the computer that is constantly
riding the level of the track. He makes the loud parts softer and the soft parts
louder. How fast he does this is the attack and release. How much he does it
is ratio. The threshold is when he wakes up to do his job and the output is
how much he turns the whole volume up after he has messed with it.
The whole process is one of experimentation. The "ON" checkbox is your
friend because it is easy to lose track of what the device is really
doing.Toggling between on and off will give you an idea of what you are
doing to the sound.
Total mixes are better handled with the multiband processor. This is a lot
more complicated but the presets work pretty well for a lot of material. The
key here is to watch the meters and adjust the amount of compression by
adjusting the input level and the output level. A good explanation of the
process is at this site: http://www.harmony-central.com/Effects/Articles/
Compression/
Does this help at all?

Check out my latest song called It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

bethrobin	bethrobin said 1264 days ago (May 24th, 2006)
	You need to work on your mixing skills [URL=http://openmic.folkalley.com/BethRobinson]vote for me![/URL] Check out my latest song called Park With Me

bethrobin

bethrobin said 1264 days ago (May 24th, 2006)

thank you so much
oops. that got away from me.
I can't wait to get home and try out some of the things you said. I guess I haven't quite gotten the whole individual track vs master track thing down yet. I'm assuming master track is for all of the tracks at once, yes? so you can't really fool with the effects too much because it will distort other instruments as well as the vocal. I use a M Audio mobilepre amp to interface with the mac. The lights that show clipping don't really respond very well. I can't count on them to see how close or loud I am. I'll go and make the pop screen though. That should keep me at the proper distance from the mic anyway.
Thanks for your comments and support. Learning all this stuff is good for me, and good for people who have to listen to me!

br

Check out my latest song called Park With Me

announcer	announcer said 1264 days ago (May 24th, 2006)
	thank you so much Master is the sum of all the tracks. What you do there deals with all the tracks. What you do on the individual track only affects that track. Good luck and be prepared to experiment. It will drive you crazy. But isn't that the purpose of Garage Band anyway? <G> Check out my latest song called It Was a Dark and Stormy Night

Tiny_Man_Inside

Tiny_Man_Inside said 1264 days ago (May 24th, 2006)

very soothing
This just has a beautiful flow to it. It sounds like sippin' mint julips on a veranda on a hot late summer afternoon. The guitar is understated, but you get a very lush tone. PV's drums are perfect as usual. This is the perfect laid-back rhythm for this song, and his fills are on-mark throughout.

My only criticism is that the song's ending seems rather abrupt. I'd love to hear a long, very gradual slow fadeout on this one - I think it would mirror the laid-back vibe perfectly.

Nice work!

Mason

Check out my latest song called Left to Swing (w/ The Composer)

bethrobin	bethrobin said 1264 days ago (May 24th, 2006)
	very soothing Thank you so much. I'm glad you got into the flow. I love the drums too. I think they add alot of depth and interest to the song and they anticipate and underline some of the key vocal parts. I know the ending is abrupt. I'll need to see what I can do about that, and if I can fix the overall mix. Check out my latest song called Park With Me

drakonis

drakonis said 1264 days ago (May 24th, 2006)

good bits
-I like your smooth voice, delivery was good but could have been even
more emotive I think, felt like you could sing this even more soulfully.
-I enjoyed the lyrics, sweet fun.
-The musical harmonies were a little odd to me (bass, guitar and
voice), not wrong, just unusual, but I think that's common in this jazzy
style, and that's just me.
-Completely agree with above comments... this is a soft jazzy romantic
song, and the back seat just wasn't made to handle the kind of kickin'
bangin' rock-n-roll sound that PV lays out there. PV's drumming was
well done, but definitely for some other song, not this one. I'd
definitely soften the touch on the skins :-)
-I like the artwork, steamed up windows and all.
So, bottom line, this is a nice first draft, I'd like to hear you put a little
more "yearning" into the singing, and ask Dave nicely to try a cooler-
jazzier style arrangement of drumming for this.
ttfn,
Drakonis

Check out my latest song called Temporal Tantrum (Sister Savage Mix)

futzpucker

futzpucker said 1262 days ago (May 26th, 2006)

An artist in bloom
I have little to add to the very intelligent comments you've received so
far, Beth.

Like others, I likewise feel that as you write and produce more songs
you will find yourself putting some slack in the reins and letting your
vocals go more and more. You have a lot to offer, and I'm sure you'll
tap into more of it as you continue developing.

I agree with the comments about the drums - I hold David and his skill
in very high regard, but were I producing this song I would have gone
in another direction, and brushes would have been the first place I'd
look.

The fact that the ending is somewhat less that satisfying really doesn't
bother me at this stage, because I think as you listen to more music
and create more of your own, many details (such as constructing a
proper ending) will begin to fall into place. That's the easy stuff.

You show great potential with your lyrics, your voice, your attitude,
your feel... All of these things will improve as you continue your
artistic journey and write and produce more songs. Please keep doing
so. It will be very enjoyable to watch you on this road.

Check out my latest song called Just As It Is

macgalver	macgalver said 1241 days ago (June 16th, 2006)
	your voice Is amazing. I love what you do with it-- Such a sweet melody, easy to listen to! Congrats on a great collaboration. I think the drums and guitar sound great. I like it a lot! MORE< BETH < MORE! Take care, sorry I didn't catch this sooner. Time to dl this one for rides with the top down. love, kelli Check out my latest song called First Sight

bethrobin

bethrobin said 1241 days ago (June 16th, 2006)

your voice
you are so sweet. thank you always. I agree with all the expert comments people have made. I've already forced myself to experiment with compression and eq'ing and now I'm going to rework this song and take it down half a step which I think is a better range for me to emote in. Of course that means new guitars and bass. Drums can stay the same, at least. But I have lots of other songs I'd like to start developing first. I'm constantly amazed at the depth and variety that I hear on this site. I feel like I'm only barely scratching the surface!
I'm waiting on the edge of my seat for your next creation!

Check out my latest song called Park With Me

	LeavingSanity said 1233 days ago (June 24th, 2006)
	Got room for me? Sexy. Fun. New to the site. Found this by accident. Really cool trip. Thanks.

sloparts

sloparts said 790 days ago (September 10th, 2007)

Obviously, this is gonna get my attention.
And it isn't the lyrics that did it, it's the sultry sound of your voice and the smooth sound of the music that is backing you up.

The lyrics are erotic and compelling to say the least, but they also have a sweet melancholy touch that brings you into the song and makes you want to be there.

Ahh the memories of fire and passion that this brings to mind are wonderful reminders of how sweet loving can be. And how exciting.

Excellent production with a great mix and great playing. I like what you've done here very much. Thank you for sharing.

Ed

Check out my latest song called Just a little Something

Fan List

macgalver

Artist Info

Name: Beth Robinson

Sweet and gentle west coast writer, Beth Robinson, blends her skillful acoustic guitar with a strong, clear voice on songs chronicling personal insights, often about members of the opposite sex. This life feels rich and carefully explored; one that l... [see more]

Check out some of my other songs:

Became One_v10

Genre Info

Smooth jazz is generally described as a genre of music that utilizes instruments (and, at times, improvisation) traditionally associated with jazz and stylistic influences drawn from, among other sources, funk, pop and R&B. Since the late 1980s, it h

More songs in Smooth Jazz:

Chat

BoiAfrica	52
Boundless	7
Cashed-In	54
Feter	40
FrankAxtell	41
JasonGoodman	13
jiguma	54
MarkHolbrook	20
maxruehl	66
mikkinylund	62
Pink_Waters	0
scaustrita	12
Sir Bass	32
sloparts	27
VicDiesel	45